Riddles of Steel or... Mitch Plays With Dolls

I thought I knew everything there was to know about my favorite movie of all time, Conan the Barbarian! I mean we go way back... way before the oceans drank Atlantis, even before the rise of the Sons of Aryas. But when I stumbled upon this fanTASTIC clip of dancer, actress, and valkyrie extraordinaire Sandahl Bergman on Youtube, I nearly swallowed my Dubble Bubble.


Because I'm a very classy guy, I shant go into detail here. But if there was any possible way this video could give me more raging boners that it already does, it would have to be dipped in the finest of Bavarian chocolate and autographed by Captain Lou Albano himself.

So anyway, my fevered search for this VHS gem led me to the pretty fucking sweet/totally lame-ass girly girl custom doll art of Tanya Van Der Ploeg. A lot of her work makes the gay man in me swoon, and drink those little individual Crystal Light packets you add to bottled water. But of course it was the Valeria doll that touched me so. Eat this:


"She carries a knotted climbing rope (to help her up the temple wall) complete with grapling hook. :-) Her pants are cotton knit, hand sewn to her - how ELSE do you get the painted on look? LOL - her boots are, I'm afraid, "pleather" - again for the skin hugging effect.
She wears three leather belts, one permanent with the classic skull emblem, one riveted to support the scabbard when it's slung over her back and one buckled"

and the best part...

"Her sword is hand ground carbon steel with a walnut handle and beaded pommel. This is *NOT* a toy, it has been sharpened and will cut!"

Oh snap! Just like the G1 Transformers!


Okay stop typing. Now somebody please get me a commission so I can afford to buy a 20 year old workout tape off of some overcharging punk on ebay. Hey thanx k bye! lol omg d2: the mighty ducks

Q: Are those space pants? (See Reverse For Answer)

This is just a doodle that I managed to find the time for the other day. I call it "Hey Moon Vampire Einstein... Are Those SPACE PANTS?" and when I see it I hear bassoon-laden go-go beat biker theramin jazz rock. Or I will whenever I decide to finish it.

BUT WAIT... WHAT'S THIS?!

Kick-ass colors by fellow blogger and all-round little rascal Justin White! Ch-check it out! He's had about a million shirts printed over at Threadless and he's only like 12 years old. If I'm lying, I challenge him to defy me. Thank you, jublin! I asked and I received. And it rules. *roundhouse kick*



(A: Yes.)

It's so totally art! BEHOLD!

an octopus

a customizable He-Man template


art.

I know you care, so why don't I tell you what I've been up to! I was working two jobs (that's bad), but now I'm back to one (that's good). I don't have internet access on my computer (that's bad), but I do still draw every day (that's good). I watched Under Siege on TV last night (that's good), but then it made me think about that awful Under Siege 2 (still with this?).


So that's why I haven't been paying particular attention the "blogosphere" lately. Also, I ran out of gas. I... I had a flat tire. I didn't have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn't come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake! A terrible flood! Locusts! IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD!!!

That was fun. See ya soon!

Here I go again! (on my own)

Hey what a goofy-lookin' bastard! Oh wait that's me. Crap! I sketched it last night and I'm kinda proud of it, I must say. Mayhaps it could use a splash of color, though. Mayhaps indeed, methinks.

I'm back, baby! You have to imagine George Costanza yelling it.

Also, Whitesnake fucking rules. *rock!*

testing

You can ring my bell!

Just some stuff from a "draw another blogger" thread at one of my forums. It was kinda fun since I never draw people I know.
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And hey, feel free to check out some of the kick-ass blogs over there >>> that you might not have seen before! They're mostly good people, who still think this is a good town.

Chicks dig me because I rarely wear underwear, and when I do it's usually something unusual.

Do you ever have that dream where you're making a name for yourself in the underground San Francisco art scene with a run of surprisingly successful comics and a brand new line of designer T-shirts when a weekend of congratulatory boozing with your friends turns into a month of coke-fueled debauchery that leads you to a luxurious bed in the vacation suite of Dana and Milena, the most beautiful lesbian power-couple in New York City, and when young Dana, owner of a chic string of galleries scattered about the city and the forever-seductive Milena, editor of the hip non-zine IRONIQUE, the rag that essentially makes and breaks the names of the scene's "who's who" in art, offer to make you the hottest thing to hit town since Ghostbusters II, you boldly accept their forbidden sex pact with wide-eyed moxie and a "ready to change the world" vigor...


...but soon the voracious black hole that is fame saps away your talent and zest for life, and somewhere along the way, between the nightly cocktail parties and club openings, you realize that... that you can't find true happiness in snorting a line of coke off of Alan Cumming's ass... but that happiness comes with time, in the personal goals you accomplish, the many roads you travel, and the friends you meet along the way?

I've never had that dream. But I'll probably try tonight.